Pre-Life Memories, Spirit Realm & Dispelling Fear from our Life with Christian Sundberg

So, welcome everybody to State of Mind Hypnosis. This is my channel, and I’d love to introduce Christian Sundberg. When Christian was a young child, he remembered his existence before coming to Earth. While that memory left him completely for his early adult life, it spontaneously returned 11 years ago as Christian took up a meditation practice and went through a personal awakening journey. He also began to have out-of-body experiences (OBEs). Christian now often speaks publicly as he seeks to remind others, at least in a small part, of who we really are beneath the human play.

Professionally, Christian has worked for over 15 years as a project manager for complex nuclear pump and valve manufacturing projects. Christian is the author of the upcoming book, A Walk in the Physical, which attempts to successfully describe the large spiritual context in which we exist and the importance of love in our human journey. So, welcome, Christian.

Christian: Thank you. I’m so honored to be here. Thank you for accepting my interview request.

Host: Yeah, sure. I’m happy to do so. This is an exciting time, right? It seems like a lot of us here today are healers. We’re here to help humanity on some level. I’m not exactly sure, but I like that.

Christian: Yeah, there’s a great process happening now. We call it the awakening or some other terms, even the word “New Age” I think comes from this process. But the idea is that our collective consciousness is going through an important shift right now.

Host: Yeah, absolutely. And this kind of information is important. It can shake things up a little, but it’s important to remind each other who we really are.

Christian: That’s right. The truth of where we come from is wonderful and good. So, it’s just great to have the opportunity to share with others a bit of a reminder of what we really are underneath this play, as you mentioned.

Host: Right. I know I have all these dreams of theaters, and I don’t know why. Maybe it’s just my mind playing out the play, showing me a metaphor because I really don’t go to the theater that often—maybe once a year. I remember looking, and there was just ahead of me a guy in a chair, and I felt like it was a guide or something. He turned to me, and I was watching the play or something, and he said, “You are the light.” And I woke up, and it was just beautiful.

Christian: That’s wonderful. [Laughter]

Host: So, yeah, I wanted to ask you about the idea of pre-life planning. I know in other videos, we talk about your pre-life memories. We’re not going to get into those in this video—there are lots of others for whoever’s watching to go watch. But this is just kind of an overview of a lot of different stuff in this video about the other side, memories, reincarnation, maybe even out-of-body experiences. So, I’d love to just ask you how you go about thinking about pre-life planning.

Christian: Yeah, well, I can only really speak to what I experienced. As you mentioned, I have pre-birth memory. When I was a small child, I remembered that we had come from somewhere else besides Earth. I knew we were just coming here to have a neat experience, but that memory did leave me for most of my life—left at about the age of six through about the age of 30. I’m 41 right now, and when I was 30, I began to take up a meditation practice, and the memory returned somewhat spontaneously.

I didn’t mention it for seven or eight years. It just didn’t feel like the right time, and also, this kind of thing—you don’t just go out and share it. It’s pretty unusual for what our mainstream society thinks about or understands. But it’s not something I think about every day. It’s too present. It’s just very influential on my day-to-day experience.

Okay, so part of that was, as you mentioned, the pre-life planning. So, in my case, I knew that I wanted to re-engage, re-experience an ancient fear—a very low-vibration fear that had bested me in a past experience. It had overcome me, and in a previous experience, I had died pretty painfully because of this fear. It had led me down a path, and I wanted to re-engage that fear, even though I knew it would be extremely challenging and difficult to do so. I discussed this with my guide, and it was such a vibrational extremity that I asked him, “Is it even possible? Has it ever been done in all of creation? Has a being ever integrated an experience at this extreme in this way?” And he shared, “Yes, it is possible. It has been done, and you have all time available to you to do so.”

And I just knew in my being, well, if it can be done, I can do it. I will do it. I just had this great confidence that if it was possible, I will do it, even though it seemed very challenging vibrationally to come this far into this deep of a constraint set and to meet a fear that was this low vibration and to integrate that fear.

So, in my case, the pre-life review for this life was—I don’t want to say even primarily around that fear, but it was a really important aspect of what this life would offer me. And I reviewed what I can only describe as a vast flowchart of millions and millions of possibilities of how this life might unfold—what was very likely or what was less likely to happen.

And it wasn’t so much events—I mean, there were events in this review, there were specifics—but it was more about what it would actually be like to be this person, to experience this from this perspective, and to be me. Because I find that, in general, in the physical, when we talk to each other, we like to discuss events, actions, time. Well, in the non-physical, information exchanges are far more complete. There’s like a telepathic exchange that’s very rich and thorough, and it really is about what is it to be you and what exactly are you experiencing—not just, you know, did you go to this place or did you buy this thing. It’s certainly not that limited.

So, in this case, my pre-life review was in such a way where I was reviewing what I can only describe as a flowchart. It looked like if you laid a tree on its side—this is just a metaphor—but if you laid a tree on its side, and it was very thick at the front, and it kind of went out into branches that were thinner and thinner the further out you went. It was kind of like that. And there were certain avenues of the life that were very highly likely and some that were very unlikely.

Host: Oh, wow.

Christian: And so, what was the thing that determined how that would play out? Well, at the time, it was unknown at the time I reviewed it because there’s free will choice-making going on all over the place, both by me and by every other player in the game—every other person here. So, there’s a lot of interaction happening that’s continually changing how it will unfold, how it seemed to be unfolding. But I knew in reviewing this pre-life plan that it was extremely likely that I would be traumatized in my early 20s—early or mid-20s. I even thought about it in numerical ages. I had a very structured way of reviewing even numerically that it would be in my earlier mid-20s that I would very likely be crushed and traumatized in a very extreme way, and that it would give me the opportunity to re-experience this very low-vibration fear that I had experienced in a past experience.

And so, I was super excited. I mean, that’s like the most—so I have to just say for anyone who’s listening today that the opportunity to be human is such a precious gift. It’s not like we’re thrown in here, you know, like we’re forced to do now. We choose to come, even though there’s a very—even though the constraints here are off the charts, even though being human is an extremely low vibration by comparison state of being, and even though there’s a lot of difficulties that we can deal with day-to-day here on Earth—from that side, the opportunity of the contrast is seen, and there was so much opportunity in this life experience layout—I don’t know how else to describe it—that was being that I was reviewing that I was very, very excited. Excitement is the overwhelming emotion.

It wasn’t—I mean, you could say there is even some objective trepidation or something, but all is well though from that side. You know that there is no way to fail. You can’t actually truly be harmed. You can only have this deep, convincing experience, go see how far you can go, and then see how you can deal with that experience and how you can integrate that experience and how you can bring love into that experience.

Yeah, and that was seen to me. I was just deeply humbled and honored that I would have the chance to do this. And I knew that this trauma that would follow me would crush me in a way that I had never quite experienced before. And I knew that the life trajectory because of the setup of this life and because of the limitations of the body—I knew that this biology has certain unique limitations. I knew that I would be going further out in one experiential direction—one energetic direction—than I had ever gone before. And I knew that it would send me far past—it’s hard to explain.

Okay, so I just have to interrupt and say that all this is almost impossible to describe. I usually begin any conversation with this disclaimer that these things cannot possibly be said in words because who we truly are transcends the entire world of form, the entire world of duality. It transcends linear time, distance, words. It’s so rich and vast and full that there’s no way that I can use words.

So, I’m just kind of clunking around in the dark trying. So, I just want to make that disclaimer because that’s super important because it’s not—it cannot be literally just—there’s no way to bring earthly words, this lower vibrational simple language, to that which is so great.

But anyway, I knew that I would be going past what I can only describe as like—if all the distances I had known and experienced in past experiences had little outposts or something—like how far I had gone before—this vibrational direction would take me way past in one direction that I had ever experienced. And I’m there right now. Like, I actually feel this incredible distance away that I am.

Host: Yeah.

Christian: And I seek to integrate that distance while I’m here in my day-to-day experience.

Host: Absolutely. Are you able to—I know from a lot of groups that I’m in, and sometimes even clients say that when we’re here, we say, “I don’t want to come back.” Right? Yeah, you’re gonna come back. I often speak to it saying, “Well, if you know you’re home and you’re coming back again, then you’re not scared to come here, right?” For the most part, I’m angry. Would you agree with that?

Christian: Yeah, I agree. I agree with that. So, from—okay, so this state of being that we’re in right now is one of parent separation. We feel separate from one another, and we are in an experience of extreme separation right now. This is not typical. This state of being human—whoever is listening today—you know, the state of being you and being human and feeling separate from everyone else and from the world and feeling alone—it is an extremely unique and alien state by comparison of what we normally experience and who we normally are in the spiritual realm.

We engage in many other experiences that are not this extreme. Only the bravest among us—I would say—I mean, I don’t want to take this literally, but only the bravest are going to sign up to do this because it’s such an extreme experience of separation, and it can prompt a lot of fear.

And I shared in my pre-birth experience video that when I first incarnated, when I first accepted the veil—which is the constraint and consciousness space that are applied and or wrapped around you—I don’t know how to describe it, but it’s just a bunch of constraints that come over you, and you have to surrender to it.

And amongst those constraints is the experience of separation—feeling alone and being cut off from all your knowing—like all the rest of what you know, which is a lot. It’s everything. You’re being cut off from everything else. And so, for me, I responded in fear immediately after accepting the veil. So, I’m putting that in perspective because indeed, the constraints of being in this place can be very high. I mean, the vibrational place is very extremely low by comparison.

So, what happens is we get here, and we immediately have fear because we haven’t yet fully integrated an experience of this extremity and this distance. And so, when we have fear, ego naturally immediately arises and tries to come to the rescue for the power that seems to have been lost. We seem to have lost all this power. We seem to have lost this connectedness and this love. It seems to have vanished. So, the ego just frantically rises up and tries to do whatever it can to reclaim the power—establish beliefs, justify the self, focus on the self, get the next thing that makes me feel whole for five minutes—whatever it can do.

So, I’m stating that in the context of your question because usually, it’s from the egoic standpoint that we say, “I’m not doing this ever again. This is too hard.” Usually, what’s happening is we’re in resistance to the fear that we have not yet met in this life. Okay, so now that’s okay. It’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with that. That’s just how it is because we have yet to evolve fully to fully meet this experience.

But from the other side, from the spiritual side, it can be seen that all is well, and we are powerful immortal beings of love and joy, and our life is connected to all life with a capital L, and there is nothing to fear. That there is never anything to truly fear. That distance that we seem to come—I don’t want to say it’s not real, but it’s an illusion. It’s not fundamentally real. That’s the way I like to put it. Like, when we’re here, it feels real—like it’s a real experience being human—but it’s not a fundamentally real state. The form of Earth and the distance we experience on Earth is not fundamentally real.

So, we can see that from the other side, and also, we have access to all information. So, making the determination is done at the soul level—not the ego level, not the local human personality level—but the big you, the I that knows all the information, all the history. And that I is incredibly powerful and connected.

So, that is still you. It’s not a different being. Whoever’s listening, the you that feels like you to you is your soul. It’s still you, but from that state where you’re unveiled, there’s a much, much higher vantage point. And from that vantage point, it’s not like there’s ignorance. I mean, we can see that this might be a very extreme experience to be human, but nevertheless, it can also be seen that the opportunity for the expansion of being, the expansion of consciousness, the expansion of spirit, growth of love and joy, is so huge that it is often us who ask for something challenging and dive into a context that can seem very challenging.

And then, for many people—and it’s okay that this happens—many people will then spend a lifetime struggling with the challenges that are being met. We all do that to one degree or another. This is so extreme that it’s not something that we do all at once. So, I think that’s a long answer to your question, but I think that’s pertinent background for why here—you know, it’s kind of ironic because here, everybody just wants to be done and get out.

Yeah, not everybody, but most people are like, “I’m done with this. I don’t like this. This world’s crazy. I’m getting out of here. I’m never coming back.” Now, most people will say that. In fact, as you know, when I think from when I’m in my ego state, I feel the same way. Like, “I’m not doing this again. This is too much.” But I also know that I cannot judge as the human personality character. I don’t know. I can’t see well enough. So, all I can do is try to meet my experience the best way that I can.

Anyway, what I was going to say was it’s kind of ironic because everybody here wants to get out, but what’s very interesting is that on the other side, the opportunity to have a chance to be here and to play one of these characters and to be in this role is so precious. There are far, far more beings who are interested in participating than there are slots—you know, births, characters, avatars to play, you know, in those crude terms. So, we all want to get out, but it’s actually an opportunity.

Host: Yeah, so how do you think—do we put our hands up? Do we—because if a lot of beings are looking to come here to other planets or wherever, how is that chosen? Do you—yes?

Christian: Okay, so in my case, I remember that I wanted to meet this fear. I had reviewed who I was and who I had been with my guide, and then I basically—this is just so hard to explain because it makes it sound so limited—but I expressed what I was interested in doing, and they brought me a life.

Actually, as I mentioned in the other videos, this life was not the first life they brought me. They brought me another life that was more appropriate than this life is, and that other life, unfortunately, I basically wasted that life because when I accepted the veil, I was so overcome by fear within seconds of being there that I summoned my might and fought my way back out. I fought my way past the veil, and I inadvertently killed the fetus. I killed the body that was mine, and I had a life review, and I became aware that I had made the mother’s journey far more difficult—not only the poor mother but hundreds of other people would be affected by the mother and I, and I was responsible for that. I am responsible—well, I’m not going to put it in the past tense—I am responsible for that because that’s still me.

So, anyway, I was interested in still doing, and then they brought me this life. So, there’s—we might say there’s like a database, and spirit—especially the wise and loving guides who are helping facilitate this for us—are very good at very efficiently sifting through the information and seeing who you are and where you are energetically and in your growth path and bringing a life that will be optimal.

We could say it will provide enough challenge but hopefully not too much challenge. But usually, the soul who says, “I want more challenge because I want to go big—I want to go big,” yeah, and then they say, “So, at least I’ve read this in other forms, I’ve heard there’s some other experiences—no, that’s too much. Don’t bite off that much. You can’t chew that much.” Anyway, so in my case, it’s not that I went and found a life.

The guides brought the life to me, and then I reviewed it, and then I knew—okay, so my soul has certain qualities. The soul has many qualities. It’s very rich in its vibrancy and its nature, and that has to interface with the life and the—this is hard to explain, but there has to be like an integration of the two—like who the soul is and how the life will be and who they will be and what the biology and the circumstances and everything else. And so, that’s an important part of it.

Yeah, so in this case, they brought me this life, and I reviewed it, and I knew there were certain ways that it might not be perfectly appropriate for me, but it was good enough for my purposes. It was pretty good. So, I accepted it. So, I suspect that—I know that one of the teachers I really respect and admire is the physicist and consciousness explorer Tom Campbell, and Tom has said that beings with less experience don’t necessarily have a specific plan. They just want to get in and have experience and then get out, and that helps them just getting any experience.

And I suspect that’s probably true for those who have less experience, but I think that as we go through experience, as we grow, we become more and more specific about what we want to experience. And I’m being careful not to use the word “learn” only because it is learning, but it’s not intellectual learning. It’s not behavioral learning. It’s experiential learning. And so, like, to be what it is to be this—to apply oneself into this certain context—that’s what it’s really about.

So, I think—yeah, so I think that—I don’t know about other beings. I just know that in my case, I asked for something specific, and I was brought an opportunity.

Host: That’s amazing. I’m sorry—what are your thoughts on multiple lifetimes—simultaneous lifetimes—had by the same oversoul or higher selves? What are your thoughts on that?

Christian: So, I do think it’s possible for one soul to play multiple characters at the same time. Well, I know for certain that happens when you go to the higher levels of the now because the one great now in which all is occurring contains many experiences. But if you mean it in a more local sense of can one soul play two humans on Earth at the same time, I believe so.

Yeah, I did not review that in my own experience, but I know that the soul can do a lot more than just play one human at a time. You know, like, this is just a crude metaphor, but if you’re sitting at a computer and playing a video game—you know, we can only do one at a time—but imagine that the soul can sit at more than one computer at once. Yeah, and you know what I mean? So, it can engage multiple realities, multiple video games, and characters at the same time.

Host: Yeah, that’s a good metaphor. What are your thoughts on—I’m just thinking now that when I take clients through life-between-lives and the things they see sometimes—what are your thoughts on schooling there? You know, I don’t know—my mind’s exploding with all different thoughts, but I’ll go into one avenue. So, it’s this idea of learning while you’re there.

Christian: Yeah, well, that definitely happens. Okay, so I have memories of some activities that I did in between physical lives, and some of them I would definitely call learning activities. And what I mentioned in the other video was I actually practiced surrendering to the veil because I had wasted that previous life, and I didn’t want to do that again. So, I practiced in this place that can be described as a room where it’s like jumping into a dark pool, and then it’s like a veil coming over you—this dark pool—and you go down, down, down in the pool, but you can cry uncle, and they’ll let you out because it’s not real. It’s just a simulator, so it’s for practice. You see how far you can go, and the real thing is much more difficult than the simulator, I remember.

But as for attending classes, what comes to mind is actually something that happened in this life. Okay, so when our bodies are asleep—I know this is going to sound strange to people—but when our bodies are asleep, we are still active. We go do things, and we don’t remember everything that we do because the veil is really good. It’s very effective at keeping us focused here, and we’re only remembering our day-to-day lives here. That’s what it does, and it’s super good at it. But we do go do things at night while our bodies sleep.

A few years ago, I had an experience where I visited a classroom as a super short-term visiting tutor or something—like a teacher to the—yeah, it was like just one very specific tiny lesson. And I was there with a friend of mine who is in this life with me now. This friend of mine—he and I are friends now as adults, but when we were in high school, this friend of mine was pretty mean to me at a certain time where he—I was interested in a girl, and so he approached this girl and had a romantic encounter with her kind of just despite me—just as a social positioning thing because humans do all sorts of crazy stuff like that.

So, anyway, in this experience, he and I were there in this classroom, and the classroom—okay, so in thought-responsive environments, the environment appears to match the energy of what is being taught. So, this environment, the way I perceived it, was black stone—very bleak and curved and just really lacking any comfort. Everything was black stone, everything was just the most basic cold material, just kind of trying to get the feet wet of these beings who were basically aspiring to incarnate and to come this deep and to do this type of deep experience.

So, all we were there to do is show them, “Look, we’re an example of what friends do on Earth—even friends.” Because we’re friends, and we were sharing with them, “Look, what this guy did to me—isn’t that kind of funny?” Because everything—everything’s just to say that from the higher perspectives, everything is really funny because we take our lives so seriously here, but they’re really okay. It’s just the play. We don’t take it so seriously.

But anyway, in this classroom, we were simply communicating to these beings—I don’t want to use the word “students” because that implies hierarchy, and it’s not hierarchical—but these beings who were learning, and we were basically just saying, “See, Earth is so hard. We’re even friends—friends. Well, even when friendship is close, and you only have so many friends, but even friends do this.” And they were like, “Oh, like that doesn’t make any sense. Friends are—because our friendships go so deep into the recesses of time. Like, we all have ancient, deep, deep, deep relationships that we temporarily forget while we’re here.” Yeah, anyway, that’s just what comes to mind about your classroom comment.

Host: And so, to jump off that—what about soul groups? Because I hear a lot—I see people go through it. What are your thoughts on that?

Christian: So, I don’t have any in my pre-birth memory. I had no interaction with that concept, but since I’ve been here, I feel that I—okay, I intuitively sense the soul family thing and who is in my soul family. And I’ve had two times in my life where I’ve come across someone who I did not know very well, but I was instantly certain they were in my soul group. Oh, yeah. And one person, I did not discuss it with because it would not have been appropriate within the human circumstances, but the other person, I ended up talking to her about it, and we had a bit of a non-physical exchange.

I don’t know—this doesn’t usually happen. I mean, I’m a pretty normal guy. I don’t usually, but I had a non-physical exchange with her higher self in a way that I was able to prove to her and I that it actually happened. And I think that was possible because her energy was very easy for me to feel. So, sometimes I feel the energy of people or places—like who they are, a little bit—just a little bit of who they really are.

And her energy was very easy for me to engage with because we were so similar and connected. I don’t know—there’s like certain qualities I could even probably try to point out about my soul tribe, and so it’s easy then to interact with a soul member. But I don’t know much about the topic in a tangible way beyond that. I just sense that soul families, soul tribes exist. I can’t explain how or what that means. I just sense that it’s real.

But the thing is, we’re all family though. Like, I don’t want to—okay, like, because here on Earth, we love our tribes, and we love us versus them, and my family versus your family, my nation versus your nation, my political group—who we truly are is so much beyond that. We are beings of love and connectivity and freedom, and there’s no boundaries to that. We are all brothers and sisters, and none of us are strangers to each other in a true sense. We’re strangers here on Earth because we’re veiled, and we have to play the roles and all that good stuff, but truly, we’re all connected. So, I don’t think it’s that pertinent to necessarily draw a distinction between a soul tribe or not. I think it’s just groups within groups within groups, but it’s all—we’re all connected.

Host: Yeah, absolutely. Like, the collective consciousness of humanity as a group, for instance—like everyone who’s participating in the human experience is lending their energy into a pond—an ocean of energy that is specific to the human experience. And that pond energy exists in higher thought-responsive realities as a thing—as a place—and within it is all of the context of everything that’s been thought and considered in the Earth environment, especially ideas or experiences that many of us have focused on. So, I’m just pointing that out in the context of your question because it’s very complex. There are collective groups, and so like even just the collective consciousness of humanity—like that is something we are all a part of, but it’s also its own thing.

Christian: Wow, absolutely. No, that makes sense.

Host: And while we’re on souls, I also see a lot of people struggling with—I’m not sure if you can speak to this, but I’ll ask it—I see people struggling with the thought of, “Okay, I have a higher self that’s put my personality into this body, but when I get back to that higher self, are they just—you know, what is that higher self? Do I merge back into that higher self and then forget everything? And who is that higher self? Are they existing right now with us along the same lines?”

Christian: Yes, so yeah, okay. So, you are the higher self too, and you are already on the other side right now. That is a really important idea because we—okay, so small children and babies—even though they’re veiled, they come and go quite frequently. They’re much more aware of the spiritual realm. I’m going to tie this back to your question because they’re not yet deeply associated with the identity of being human and the identity of being separate and the stories—the ego stories and the personality stories and the identity stories and the thoughts. We create this huge amount of thought momentum about who we are, what our problems are, and what we’ve got to do and all this stuff.

So, that thought bubble is what being human is all about, but your consciousness is already on the other side right now. It’s just that the veil helps you to be immersed without distraction. And when you are able to fully release the thoughts and the association with form, then the awareness that you really are—it’s beautiful—it can rise up on its own, and you’ll find that peace and joy and love are what you already are. And that’s not just an idea. Like, you don’t sit down and meditate, stop thinking, and now you get a new idea. It’s not an idea. It’s a tangible state of being that is known within the body of your awareness itself. And the you that you really are is that body of awareness. It’s not that you’re separate. It’s that the body of awareness that you are—you might think of it, to put it in earthly terms because we love breaking things down into pieces—but an earthly term that’s like the higher self takes a subportion of itself and allocates that into a veiled experience, and the rest of it is still on the other side. That’s an okay way to think of it.

In fact, there are no boundaries except the ones that we’ve lost ourselves within. So, that’s why meditation can be so helpful, by the way, as a tangent because as one meditates, one becomes increasingly familiar with what one really is, which is awareness itself, and the thoughts lose their oomph because you’re regaining your ability to not prioritize listening to them. You now focus power of focus, and when the thoughts lose their oomph, it means the ego stories lose their hump because there’s no—because now you’re not listening. Now, thoughts can’t save you from your own fears. What I’m trying to get to is that your fears may rise up, and they can seem silly on the surface of the thinking mind, but anything that’s stuck—anything that’s down there that you’re afraid of—self-perception, a perception about the world—can rise back up to be felt now because you are no longer lost in the story. And that’s good. That’s a good sign.

So, I’ll just leave it at that because I don’t think I can say anything else. I just know that it’s important to take the time, and taking the time to do this is very powerful because not only—and then people sometimes say, “Well, what do I get out of it?” Well, first of all, it’s kind of an Earth way to think, but what I was going to say is what you get out of it is that which is more valuable than anything you could find in an object. That is, if you even experience a small taste of the true peace of your being—and again, you didn’t go get it, but it can rise back up on its own when you’re fully present with the now—when you’re fully alert and aware and present and not judging and allowing all—then the peace that was always there can just reveal itself, and oh, it’s breathtaking.

It’s the most beautiful, precious—it’s the nectar of life. It’s like the bliss of being. There is no value we can put on that. And then, of course, immediately the ego will jump in, “Oh, what’s that? I gotta get more of that. I don’t want to lose that.” Yeah, okay, that’s okay. You know, that’s okay if it happens to me. That’s pretty normal. But still, one taste of that—one knowing of what we really are in even the smallest moment—it can be life-altering. You know, like, you can’t go back because you’ve made that connection, and it’s experiential, and it’s there.

Yeah, and yes, we can go deeper into the world of form. We can go back into focusing on form things and get lost in association, and we can come back. You know, there’s this waxing and waning that can take place, and that’s fine, but the value of that is beyond some achieving some end. You would find, though, naturally, though, at least I found that if I experienced that—when I experienced that—it’s everything in life. Like, all the things that were terrifying aren’t anymore, and all the limitations don’t matter. I don’t know—they’re beautiful. In fact, everything becomes so beautiful.

Yeah, like, you can look at a straw or a stone, and you’re not making it up because you’re high or something. No, you see this is beautiful. This is a form of existence, and you’re seeing it in a way that is not obscured by the thinking. Now, thinking is like being in a dream, and actually, thinking is like being in a pretty painful dream. Yeah, thinking can hurt. All the thinking—thinking, thinking, must do, must you, must do, must find, must still hold, must be the thing—I’m not good enough.

Oh my gosh, I heard what’s this pain? What did this person say? I mean, you know, that hurts. It’s not peaceful. Yeah, so it’s really wonderful, and it’s natural then as we do that, the ego can rise up even stronger sometimes. I’ve definitely experienced that because now, basically, it’s life—to put it in dramatic human terms—the ego’s life has been threatened. I mean, I’m being a little dramatic because it’s not like it doesn’t need to be dramatic at all, but the ego’s life has been threatened because you’ve begun to remove the pulls in the tent. Yeah, so the tent’s starting to come down, and so then the part of you that’s afraid will rush forward, “Oh, we gotta put this tent back up. We gotta put this tent back up. Where’s the tent going?”

That is a worthwhile journey. It is a very worthwhile journey because it’s basically the facing of fear, and that’s one of the reasons I love Tom Campbell’s work so much. His big core reality model focuses on love.

Love is the reason we’re here. Love is why we’re here, and in Tom Campbell’s model, conquering fear is synonymous with love. And that aligns so very much with what I experienced in my pre-birth experience and choosing this life. I knew that if I could integrate this fear—if I could meet it, face it, heal it, be fully present with it—then the native being of love that we are could expand in such a powerful, amazing way. Love is what we are.

We are already loved. Everyone is already of love. Everyone already wants love, needs love, loves love, loves giving love, is of love. Love and freedom and joy are the substance of what we are, and fear is—again, we’re so right now in duality, so we’re talking about duality like opposites as if they’re real, but even duality is a creative tool.

It’s not actually fundamentally real, but while we’re here, we experience fear because, like I said, we haven’t integrated this experience. We haven’t fully actualized our true loving nature here. So, when we meet fear and overcome fear, that’s so powerful because we’re liberating our true selves, and we are participating in the expansion of being simply by integrating the fear.

And so, that ties into the meditation comment because, like I said, if you meditate and if you really become aware of your own crap—you become aware of your own crap enough—you find that we have fear. We have deep, deep fear. I mean, this trauma that I experienced in my 20s—I had post-traumatic stress for eight years. I couldn’t even remember my life before the age of 22 very well at all. That’s how traumatized I was. Yeah, and I went through years of EMDR therapy with a therapist, and I found layer after layer after layer of fear. Fear—if you’re here—and I kept thinking, “Oh, that’s got to be the bottom because man, that was flipping terrifying.”

And oh my gosh, I can’t believe it. It kept going and going and going. Eventually, I did find the root moment in my life that was so painful and so terrifying that I had locked it away to save myself—I thought—but I didn’t save myself. I just locked it away. Locking away doesn’t actually heal it. Yeah, to heal it, we have to be willing to feel it. We’ve got to be willing to actually face that crap that’s down there—face our own darkness—like fully let it be. Let the pain be felt. Let it rage. Let the negative perception—the negative thing that we’re trying to resist—let it happen. Let it be experienced without fear because the light of your awareness—the beacon, the light—when it goes into those places, it has a profound healing power.

Not because you’re going and fixing a problem—you’re not doing this to go fix something—you’re going this to honor how you actually feel and to feel how you actually feel and to fully meet what you’ve actually experienced. That is what we’re here to do. That is what we’re here to do. We’re here to be human, to have that experience so that we can meet and integrate that experience. And that is the very crux of what makes this human experience so valuable and powerful.

You know, it sounds—I know all that sounds really scary to the ego and maybe even completely unacceptable. I get it. I’m not making light of it, and it’s okay. Like, being afraid is okay. Yeah, it’s okay to be afraid, but you have a choice then. Yeah, what do you do with the fear? You can ignore it and try to go on with your life and talk over it, or you can say, “You know what? I’ve had enough of the fear. I’m going to go feel it. Show me what there is to be afraid of.” Like, there’s a—and I know we’re a little bit over an hour already, but I just got to say this.

So, my father—when my father was a small child, he was afraid of his closet, and he would lay in bed and look at the closet, and every night he was terrified to go to sleep because of what he imagined was in the closet. Yeah, and he got so worked up, and it was so uncomfortable that eventually he said, “You know what? Whatever the hell is in that closet, it can’t be worse than this fear that I’m experiencing laying here every night.” So, he got up, and he charged into his closet, and he pushed his way through the clothes. He was being aggressive about it. He fought his way in there, and he sat down on the bottom of the closet, and he said, “Okay, monsters, eat me.” But they didn’t eat him because there were no monsters.

So, it’s a simple metaphor, and it sounds so silly, but all of us have that closet. Yeah, we all have that thing we don’t want to face. We don’t want to feel. Is he afraid of monsters in the closet anymore? No, there were no monsters. It’s not like he had to then tell himself, “Okay, now I’m not afraid.” No, he just knew there were no monsters because he saw, and so it was experiential. It wasn’t just an intellectual thing. That’s how we need to be with our fears, our darkness. There’s nothing to be afraid of down there except feeling it itself. You’re afraid of feeling it, but walk into the closet. It may feel like it’s going to destroy you, but it won’t. Yeah, no, that’s not true.

Host: That’s a good story. Oh my—well, I could talk about this all night—hours—but we’ll wrap it up. Thank you so much, Christian, and your information will be below this video. If you want to contact either Christian or myself, all that information will be below.

Christian: Okay, thank you so much. Yeah, thank you. Thank you very much. Thanks for the opportunity. It’s been a great conversation, and I just want to say one last thing. So, whoever’s listening to this today, I just want to encourage you for a quick moment that you are a beautiful, powerful being who has come here to do this. Okay, you’re in your life. You’re deep in your life experience right now. I may not know you. I can’t see you, but I’m telling you, you are a brave being for coming here. Thank you for being where you are in your life.

Go easy on yourself. Have fun today. Just be encouraged because it’s not easy going on this walk, but it is powerful. It is meaningful. It is a precious opportunity, and we are powerful beings that aren’t going to die. There’s no such thing as death. Just gotta say that. There’s no death, so we can live in accordance with that. And I really hope that someone can be reminded of that here while we are in the middle of our walk in the physical. That’s the name of my website and the book that I’m about to finish—A Walk in the Physical—because we’re just going for a walk. That’s right. That’s it. We’re on a walk around the wilderness. We may have forgotten, but we’re just on a walk. And so, it’s important that we remind each other of who we really are and remind each other that there’s nothing to be afraid of.

Host: That’s right. That’s beautiful. All right, thank you, Christian.

Christian: Thank you so much. Have a wonderful evening. Thank you again for the opportunity. I appreciate it.

Host: Okay, thank you.

Christian: Thank you.